Coffin Hogger
by Satosen
Summary: Undertaker becomes bored with the world and takes on an assistant to liven things up a bit at his parlor warning BxB in latter chapters
1. Assistance Needed

Coffin Hogger

**New Guy**  
><strong>Chapter 1: <strong>Assistance Needed  
><em>Hey there I started getting into the mood for typing Kuroshitsuji stuff again but I've got just about no idea on what to type for The Unusual Siblings so I decided to type a long running idea kinda thing I've had for a while. It's all about Undertaker getting a special someone so that should make the Undertaker fans sorta kinda happy with me~<em>  
><strong><em>Warning Label<em>**  
><em>This Fanfictions contains Violence BxB/ Sexual stuffages/ inappropriate language. Read at your own expense and don't come crying to me if u don't like it._

_;3 Chapter Start C: _  
>It is a fairly boring day for once at the Undertaker's parlor and he found himself to be quite bored. The young earl Ciel Phantomhive struts into his parlor, with his chin held high and his chest puffed up to look intimidating and important, and is followed by his demonic butler that is smiling away with his usual smile. Ciel blinks in surprise to see The Undertaker out in the open and laying on one of his many coffins rather than slinking about trying to scare people. The Undertaker sighs boredly and sits up slowly.<br>"And what can I do u for this dreary morning my young earl?" His voice is dreary and seems to have lost its joy. Ciel steps back slightly and looks to Sebastian in concern who in turn steps up to the Undertaker.  
>"Is something the matter?" Sebastian's voice is slightly calculating as he looks at the Undertaker for the answer. He chuckles emptily as he looks at Sebastian.<br>"I seem to have finally lost all of my excitement…" Sebastian blinks in confusion at the response given to him.  
>"I'm afraid that I don't quite understand…" The Undertaker chuckles lightly but still emptily.<br>"I'm saying all of the entertainment I once found in this world is finally gone. I'm finally noticing just how bitterly alone I am and how useless I am…" The Undertaker sighs and lays back on his coffin again. "Nothin' but empty corpses and a dusty shop to keep me company…" Sebastian looks to Ciel with concern. Ceil looks back at him with a look that says 'do something you idiot'. Sebastian then sighs and looks back to the Undertaker.  
>"Might I suggest getting an assistant? Keeping someone around to help you with the shop might just be the… 'thrill?' you require." The Undertaker looks up at him in slight interest.<br>"An assistant you say? But who would want to work with me among the dead?" Sebastian puts a hand to his chin and scrunches his brow as he thinks and Ciel sighs loudly to get both of their attentions.  
>"If you were to add a small section to the papers saying that you are hiring or put a sign in front of your shop then I'm sure someone would come to take the job. England is short of jobs for its surplus of people. I'm sure any number of England's jobless people would be willing to work here with you for any amount you would pay them." Ciel raises his chin in his proud glow of actually knowing something of the matter. Sebastian looks to the Undertaker again.<br>"My young master is correct. There are plenty of people that would be more than willing to come work for you here." The Undertaker pauses then nods sitting up again.  
>"I suppose you are correct. Now, about the most recent bodies." He seems to have become a little more enthusiastic. Ciel and Sebastian both sigh in relief at having broken up the awkward tension of having the Undertaker depressed. "Each one of them seems to have been hit repeatedly with a blunt object to the base of their spines before being brutally beaten in the backs of their heads." Sebastian and Ciel frown and listen intently.<br>"Why would he go to such an extent to cripple them as such?" Ciel asks confusedly.  
>"I would suppose that it has something to do with the killer's rush from the chase~ That never lasting thrill that makes your blood boil with excitement~" The Undertaker giggles a bit regaining more of his old self as he talks to them. Sebastian puts his hand to his chin in thought.<br>"The killer first picks his victim from off the street then instills fear into them by stalking and then gradually makes his moves closer until he chases them into a corner and beats them to death with a metal pipe…"  
>"But why a metal pipe?" Ciel questions confusedly and Sebastian nods.<br>"It might be of personal effects that he kills in this way~" The Undertaker giggles lightly and Sebastian nods.  
>"Yes, I suppose you could be right, and if that is the case then we have a habitual killer that should be easy enough to catch now that we know his preferences and local kill spot." Ciel smirks.<br>"Then I'll leave the rest to you Sebastian~" He has a slight twinkle in his eye that makes Sebastian smirk as well as he bows down on one knee.  
>"Yes, My lord~" They two of them then leave the Undertaker's parlor and the Undertaker himself to slide back into lonely silence.<br>**_;3 Time Skip C:_**  
>The Undertaker sighs as he puts up a small wooden sign saying 'Assistance needed' the paint is dripped a bit to look more scary and there is a small cute black skull painted off to the side because he got bored.<br>"Will this even work?" He mumbles to himself as he walks back into his parlor and gets to work fixing up a few of his coffins as he waits for anything to happen.  
><strong><em>;3 Fin Of Chapter C:<em>**  
><em>Hey guys I hope u liked this fanfiction chapter and I hope I can keep the inspiration to keep typing it for a while longer~<em>


	2. Zack Keissath

Coffin Hogger

**New Guy**  
><strong>Chapter 2: Zack Keissath<strong>  
><em>Hey guys I'm running on hyper energy and inspiration the likes of no one can know of that know me personally so yah here's the next chapter~<em>  
><em><strong>Warning Label <strong>_  
><em>This Fanfictions contains Sexual stuffages Violence/ Inappropriate language. Read at ur own risk._  
><em><strong>;3 Chapter Start C:<strong>_  
>An entire day has passed since the Undertaker put that sign up in front of his parlor and he sighs in disappointment. What with the way Sebastian and Ciel had worded he couldn't have helped but get his hopes up now only for them to go down again. He is laying in one of his many comfortably lined coffins as he dozes off lightly and waits for anything to happen. Every minute feels like an eternity as he waits in the stifling stillness of his home.<br>The door opens and his bell rings electing a light sigh from the Undertaker's lips as he sits up in his coffin.  
>"What might I do for you on this particularly dreary evenin'?" He droles it out emotionlessly as he looks up at the young man standing in front of his door. The guy has short brown hair that reaches just below his shoulders and bangs that cover the left side of his face while framing the other side nicely. He's wearing peasant clothing and is roughed up a bit with smudges of dirt covering patches of his pale skin.<br>"U-um I-I was w-wondering i-if th-the a-assistant's j-job w-was s-still o-open h-here?" His voice is quiet and a bit shaky as he fidgets and keeps his electric blue eye to the floor. The Undertaker steps out of his coffin and walks up to the boy who is a few inches shorter than him.  
>"Are you sure you want such a job?" The Undertaker snakes a long slim black nail under the boy's chin and lifts it to look into the boy's eyes. "You seem quiet young to be in such a crude business…" The boy blinks and looks up at him his eyes shaking lightly as he swallows to get courage.<br>"I-I a-am sure s-sir…" Undertaker stares into the boy's eye for a minute before retracting his hand.  
>"If you are sure then the first thing we'll have to do is clean you up." He smiles a bit and the boy blinks in surprise.<br>"R-really?" He asks in surprise and the Undertaker nods.  
>"I'll show you were the wash room is~" Giggles a bit as he hooks his arm with the boy's and starts to lead him to the back rooms. "Whatever is your name child?~" Seems to becoming his giggling strange self again making the boy smile a bit.<br>"I-it's Z-zack sir. Zack K-Keissath…" His voice remains quiet and shaky as Undertaker walks him into a dimly lit preparation room for the dead.  
>"What an interesting name~" The Undertaker chuckles and Zack nods light before swallowing and glancing up at him.<br>"M-might I a-ask wh-what y-your name m-might b-be?" Zack stutters the question out meekly and The Undertaker laughs some.  
>"You may call me what everyone calls me, lad~ I'm The Undertaker, most just leave out the The part but I don't really care. Now lets get u cleaned up a bit, first well wash u off!" Undertaker continues to Giggle as he pulls what looked like a hanging tapestry to the side and reveals a narrow set of stairs that go up to the next floor in a spiral like fashion. "Upstairs is nothin' much but an attic so I sleep downstairs in the coffins and go upstairs to clean up, after all, you can't examine and create beauty before yourself without being clean~" Undertaker leads Zack up the stairs and he sees that on on side of the room is a mass of papers in piles upon piles and the other side is a tub a scrub and a bucket to move the water. Zack walks over hesitantly and looks over the tub and he glances at the tiles that cover the entire floor. His gaze briefly slides over the small tile blocks that keep any excess water from messing up the papers on the other side and Zack looks back to Undertaker.<br>"It's bigger than I imagined, I don't think I've ever seen a tub this big before." Zack meekly smiles at Undertaker who giggles.  
>"I'll go get more water but for now you can strip and dust out your clothes before washin' them in the bucket there." Undertaker points at a small wooden bucket in the corner that Zack hadn't noticed with it's being in the shadows. "After I'm done gettin' the water I'll let you borrow a set of my old clothes while yours dry~" Zack smiles more and nods vigorously.<br>"Thank you, Mr. Undertaker!" Undertaker chuckles and takes the moving bucket with him to go get water. Finally after several trips back and forth he comes back up with a change of cloths for Zack who is soaking lightly in the tub with his head leaned back and his eyes closed. Now that the dirt is cleaned off he looks even paler than before and Undertaker approached quietly before leaning over the tub a bit and looking down at Zack's face. A few strands of Undertaker's hair hang down and tickle Zack's face lightly making the boy open his eyes and look up into those gorgeous yellow, green eyes of the Shinigami.  
>"You almost look like a porcelain doll, I was starting to wonder if you were truly here." Undertaker's voice is quiet and Zack blushes lightly as he continues to blush and stare up at Undertaker's face.<br>"I-I am..." Zack replies quietly and Undertaker smiles a smile that looks more real than any anyone had ever seen on his face. Undertaker's hand then slightly caresses Zack's cheek and his long nail causes a shiver to take Zack as he blushes a bit more.  
>"So you are~" Undertaker whispers and moves back holding out a white towel for Zack to come and dry off on. Zack smiles a bit and carefully gets out of the tub accepting the towel with small words of thanks as he wraps it around his thin body.<br>"U-um Undertaker?..." Zack asks lightly for the Shinigami's attention just as Undertaker was about to leave the boy to dry off and change. Undertaker turns and glances back at him.  
>"Yes?" His voice is almost sweet and Zack blushes again.<br>"I-I was j-just wondering i-if you'd a-allow m-me t-to stay h-here w-with you...?" Zack bites his lip lightly and Undertaker chuckles softly.  
>"As long as you don't mind a coffin next to mine as a bed then you may stay as long as you wish~" Zack looks up surprised and then a wide smile caresses his face.<br>"Oh thank you Mr. Undertaker! I'll work hard for my keep I promise I will!" Zack is bouncing a bit with joy and Undertaker smiles like before again.  
>"I'll hold you to that promise~" Undertaker then goes back downstairs and Zack smiles almost childishly as he blushes and dries himself off.<br>**_;3 Fin Of Chapter C:_**  
><em>Hey guys I am sooooooooooo sorry for not typing another chapter until now but I had a lot to do and a lot more inspiration for some of my other fanfictions! As always please like and comment about my fanfictions! :)<em>


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